Most nights Juliette will wake up crying and end up in our bed. Sometimes I nurse her and we both fall back to sleep but on some lovely nights I stay up and just watch her for a while. I kiss her head, rub her hair, listen to her breathe, and just bask in the overwhelming love I feel for her.
Lately though, as Christmas comes closer and closer, I think about how Mary must have done the same thing with her Son. How she must have stayed up at night and just held Him and kissed Him and adored Him. It amazes me even more as a mother how Mary was able to love Jesus like no other person in the world. And if my love for my children seems overwhelming in my imperfection and my sinfulness, I can't even imagine how much she loved Jesus in her freedom from sin and all other impediments to Love. She loved Jesus and a mother and adored him as her God. That must have knocked the breath out of her every, single day.
I'd thought about this before, tried to meditate on what it meant for her to be His mother but honestly couldn't even fathom it. I think as a mother my understanding has only increased one one millionth but when I lie next to my baby and smell her head and watch her eyelids flutter I can just try to ask Mary to show me more how she loves her Son.