LOOK MOM! CRACK!

It's 8:08 pm and I just gave both of my kids large cups of chocolate milk. No idea where my brain is today... Sunday is the one day I hope they get to bed on time so I can watch Once Upon a Time in peace, just me and the honey and lemon tea in my Mrs Spencer Reid mug.

Yesterday I took the girls grocery shopping, searched out one of the carts with the cars in front so they would remain happy, and of course after a few minutes they cried mutiny. Naturally. So I gave Juliette my keys to eat and the little scanner from the front of the store to Madeleine. This led to every old lady in the store coming up to me and asking if I really wanted my baby to be chewing on my car keys and Madeleine walking up to a complete stranger (that looked like me) and saying, "Look mom! CRACK!".

Of course the scanner she was holding had a picture of crackers in the display scene and I was wearing my Northface hoodie with my blond hair neatly tucked in a headband so she didn't bat an eyelash. But if it had been a few days ago when I had bags under my eyes so bad I looked like I had been clocked across the face, sweat pants stained with the tears and runny noses of two sick toddlers, and the voice someone who loves her some Palmols, there MAY have been issues. Oh flu/bronchitis you did NOT make for my prettiest days. (I looked like I was on drugs.)

Today was mostly uneventful, teaching Madeleine how to Tebow and hardcore dance parties before daddy got home from work. We all went to mass together arriving 5 minutes late and during the homily. Note to my priest friends, PLEASE do not start mass early. Fifty percent of the time one or both of my kids poops on the way out the door and we arrive five minutes late and it stinks to already be on the homily. Especially when we are still trying to learn the parts to the new mass translation. When in doubt I usually just go with, "And with your spirit."

Now I am across the room from the kids while they play kitchen. Why? One of them smells. PMS makes me queasy so I am trying to gather up the nerve to figure out which one and change them.

Life is good. Madeleine and I took lots of photos of ourselves while the baby napped and just had so much fun together. It helps that we are just sooooo good looking and hilarious. At least we think so. Hate on, haters! Just kidding.

Love me some Kyle butt.

I'm not a creeper

Normal

Happy faces!

We have a sense of humor!

Madeleine loves a happy momma!

Seven Quick Takes- I'm having mini strokes

1. I told my mother today that I keep forgetting things that have recently happened, like putting my debit card back into my wallet or putting sugar in my coffee. It's like I'm having mini strokes.

2. I decided Juliette had grown out of 18 month clothing so I stored all of it in a box in the basement and got her 24 month clothing out of storage and washed it. Then I realized that the 24 month clothing is way too big for her. I am having a hard time motivating myself to rectify my mistake... don't pant legs just roll up?

3. I am spending the weekend at my parent's house because my dad is on retreat and my husband is working a double tomorrow. GIRLS WEEKEND! Therefore my mom and I will be renting every chick flick our husbands refuse to watch with us, eating Italian food, drinking wine, and of course, shopping.

4. In our absence Kyle spent the afternoon assembling the wooden train table that the girl's train set will on at Christmas. There is a 90 percent chance that he will spend tomorrow setting up the tracks and acting as conductor. Sometimes I wonder how I would do with a son but then I remember that often times it wouldn't be much different than how I deal with Kyle.

5. Some days I wish I could exist exclusively off nachos, brownie batter, and coffee. If I could do that and not become the fattest person ever... or you know, die.... I would totally do it.

6. I realized why I have such a massive crush on Dr Spencer Reid from Criminal Minds. It's because he is Kyle but with guns. Kyle's specialty is knowing random facts about random things and then telling you them whether you want to hear them or not. I find him very interesting. I will say that I'm glad he knows about planes and Catholic teaching instead of the behavioral characteristics of phycopaths. But still, intelligence and nerdiness is a type of hotness that I cannot deny. So Kyle, my crush on a fictional character is a tribute to my love for you. Be proud!

7. Thanksgiving is next weekend. I have plans to visit with my crazy extended family, have a sleepover and watch the sparkly vampires with my sisters, drink with my friends that I graduated high school with, and dominate family games night. This means hopefully hilarious blog posts for my readers. And Juliette's 1st birthday is next week! That means I'll be throwing some super cute pictures at you as well! Stay tuned!

For more fun visit http://www.conversiondiary.com/.

An Interesting Weekend

This weekend I visited my parents in "Stars Hollow, Connecticut". I am leaving to go back home today. Why am I here? Glad you asked! My little sister is in town!

Hannah, as well as LAUNNICK (Madeleine believes them to be one person making her understanding of the sacrament of marriage greater than most Americans), arrived early Friday morning, we are talking like 3:30, so we didn't get to see them until we woke up.

Still, the girls and I got in Thursday night waaaaay before the newlyweds and the curly blonde head so we had to find ways to entertain ourselves.

Carly had been working at a Halloween event in town and had come back with a bunch of temporary tattoos. Naturally, Carly thought it would be an awesome idea to use them on the girls so now Madeleine has a butterfly in her chubby belly and Juliette has a panda bear tramp stamp. Madeleine is very proud of her tattoo and lifts up her shirt to show it to us every ten minutes or so. And when we really tell her how pretty it looks on her she goes up to her sister and lifts up her shirt as well.

In typical fashion we spent half of Friday eating and the other half trying to figure out what to do in the evening because "Trunk or Treating" on the Town Green had been canceled due to weather. Now, I know what you are thinking. "Why were you going to something called 'Trunk or 'Treating' to begin with. That sounds like you would be walking around taking candy from strangers cars and isn't that the opposite of what we try to teach our children?" I don't know. And yes.

Saturday is when the real snowfall began. I had told my old nemisis SNOW that I refused to be put down by it this year. That it could do it's worst and I would still go out. So naturally, when the one inch it had dumped in the morning coated the street and we were trying to figure out if we should all still go shopping I laughed in the face of danger.

We got halfway there, turned around, and came home. You win this round SNOW but I will win the war.

I found out on Sunday that my power had gone out back in Massachusetts so I decided to stay the extra night here. Kyle was going to be picking up an extra shift anyway to help with the havoc the SNOW had unleashed on the airport (or more like the crazy-a people who go to the airport in the snow when their flights have been delayed or canceled just to scream at the people who work there. mess with my husband and the next time I am pregnant I WILL sit on you).

Since I was staying the extra night my mom asked if I wanted to lead Mafia at the Life Night. Since I am obsessed with crime shows (current fav, Criminal Minds. Dr. Spencer Reid. I've got a thing for tall, awkward, nerd types) I got reeeeeaaaaally into it. When it was my turn to play and someone else to lead I picked out who was in the Mafia correctly by the end of the second "night". Either I am a brilliant detective or I played waaay too much in college. I'm kind of betting the latter.

But today I am taking Elmo and Cookie Monster (or Cookie Hat as Madeleine calls the character) home to go Trick or Treating with their daddy. We miss him like CRAZY and are so excited to see him! It should be lots of fun, lots of candy, and wicked cold.

And a warning to SNOW... I'll get you next time.